Richard Wright, founding member of Pink Floyd died Monday due to a undisclosed type of cancer.

If any of you have read my weblog for any amount of time you know how much I am a fan of Pink Floyd's music. There isn't really much to say when it comes to death. He will be missed by his family, but I know that his music will at least live on with me, and I will pass that to my children.

You will be missed, but never forgotten through your music.



May U Live 2 See The Dawn

I'm kind of curious to wonder what some people would do if they spouse/significant other/partner were to pass away. Would you feel the need to see someone else in your life?

And how soon? Are you the kind of person that thrives around other people. Enjoy the company of others, where you would get lonely if you weren't with someone? Or are you the kind of person that just wouldn't find the company of someone else as enjoyable with the loss of your spouse/significant other/partner?

I am of the mind that I probably wouldn't. Companionship with someone else of the opposite sex (for me) wouldn't be the same if it were not with Angela. Mind you, we are all human, and need someone to be with us.

Would you feel that it is somehow an affront to your lost spouse, to date/be with someone else after they have passed on? Would children/family enter into your decision to do so, if such a thing were to happen?

I know that I probably wouldn't. Sex isn't really an issue for me, as far as seeing someone else. There are other ways to find that without the attachment of someone else, as something more than a sex partner. In that case, money can buy you "love".

This came about because I am about to meet my father-in-law's ladyfriend this weekend when they come to visit for Marc's birthday party. And I don't know how to feel about this, when really it shouldn't even be an issue. It's not my life. But she is also not my mother-in-law.

May U Live 2 See The Dawn

Sorry it's been so long.

We moved from where we were into a bit better of a home and all. One with a fenced back yard, which we didn't have before. Now the kids can get out of the house and play without us having to worry about oncoming traffic and all that.

Then we took a vacation in Montana that we had planned, prior to moving, so there was that when we got moved in the house. Even now there are still a few odds and end things that I still need to do to the new house, but we are 95% done.

So it's been kinda busy and what not, and I've been kinda neglectful of making new posts. Most free time I had was spent around the house or with the kids.

Also we got a pet snake for Marc. I'll post some pictures of him soon. They are on the computer at home, so I'll add them to the post then. He is a ball python named Bahamut, and is right now, probably, 14-16 inches or so. He dines on mice at the moment. His potential length can be anywhere from 3-5 ft average, 6 ft at the most.

That's about all that I can think of right now. I'll try to make my rounds and come around and visit everyone.

May U Live 2 See The Dawn

I woke up about 4am this morning, so pissed off. I just felt some burning anger in me, that was . . . well I don't get angry much, so when I do, it's ugly.

And it was all because of this dream I had . . .

My wife and I had some company. She was sitting in the living room talking to this man and woman, and I was busy around the house cleaning and whatnot. (Which really is what I do when company is at our house, because I become self-conscious about the appearance of the house.) Well soon after, I come into our bedroom and crash on the bed. I remember her asking me what is wrong. I said, I was just tired and glad that company was gone so we could have some peace and quiet.

Well, I had crashed on the bed, on my stomach. As we were talking I rolled over on my back. I was dozing in and out of sleep and all of a sudden I realize what I am feeling. [Imagination people, I'm not spelling it out. 8-)] I open my eyes, and find out it's not my wife, it was that woman that was at the house earlier, that I thought had left. I look over and there my wife is sitting there watching us.

I freaked and pulled myself up and away from her. I remember my wife saying that it was okay, she didn't mind. But for me, it just wasn't jivin. She comes over beside the two of us, and tells me that she arranged this. I remember feeling uncomfortable and that this just didn't seem like her.

Well then all of a sudden there's the dude that was here earlier to standing right over the bed beside her. My brain knows what the situation is, but my emotions just don't coincide with it.

Suddenly the baby cries. Now I know what's going to happen if I leave, but I just can't deal with it. I know but I don't want to know. So I leave to go check on our son. I go downstairs to make him a bottle, and slightly detour to our room. I look in and turn and leave just as quickly. I go into the kitchen and make the bottle for him and go to take it upstairs. I come back down the stairs and back into our room, where my wife is there alone. Now the conversation is weird.

"It's alright nothing happened."
I didn't say anything.
"He said he didn't want anything out of the ordinary, but he kept asking for things I didn't want to do."
I just looked at her.
(I really don't understand where this statement came from or what the hell it was suppose to mean.)
"I had to be his bearer."

So I left the bedroom and went into the kitchen, and that dude was in the kitchen. He started talking to me, like we were close friends or some shit. He said she (my wife) wouldn't do what he wanted. He said she was suppose to do what he said, it didn't matter if she liked it or not, that was what they had arranged.

I started towards the basement (which is out of the kitchen) and went down the stairs. He was following me, and still talking to me, but by this time I was beyond listening to him. I saw three baseball bats leaning against the wall in the basement. I remember picking the aluminum one because I knew it would hurt the most. I walked back up the stairs to the kitchen, and he still followed me.

I turned around and looked at him just as he was saying "you shouldn't be putting up with that shit, you take what you want from her . . ." and swung the bat and smacked him right in the side of the head. He fell back against the fridge and I hit him in the head again. He fell to the floor.

The rest of the dream was blurred, I just kept hitting him and hitting him, over and over again until I finally stopped. There was really just not much left on the ground but lots and lots of blood. I remember feeling mortified and satisfied at the same time. Which is really scary, being satisfied in killing someone.

Then I woke up. I think I didn't go back to sleep for a hour or better. Sitting there watching Spider-man 2 that was still on from earlier when my son woke up and wanted milk and to watch it.

That was what woke me up pissed off. Don't have any idea where that came from in my head, but it was there.

May U Live 2 See The Dawn

It's like an addiction. You just have to have more. Once you've tasted it, there is no turning back.

Tasting the forbidden fruit. Do it to me one more time. From start to finish. Nothing else is like it. You spellbound me.

The way you move, the way you speak. You know what I desire. The way you move you tease me. I just want to feel me inside you. Each time we part, I find another reason why, to be with you.

Do it to me one more time . . .

I need you.

I know it's hard to love me.

You make love slow and easy.

I just want you here inside me.

 

May U Live 2 See The Dawn